THOSE WHO MAY CARE July 3, 1996: The Welfare Hotel

************************************************************************** * Hoteling Summarized (You PW folks should love this) * ************************************************************************** The only drawback to the cubicle-oriented office is that some employees develop a sense of "home" in their little patch of real estate. Soon pride of ownership sets in, then self-esteem, and poof -- good-bye productivity. But thanks to the new concept of "hoteling," this risk can be eliminated. Hoteling is a system by which cubicles are assigned to the employees as they show up each day. Nobody gets a permanent work space, and therefore no unproductive homey feelings develop. Another advantage: Hoteling eliminates all physical evidence of the employee's association with the company. This takes the fuss out of down-sizing: the employee doesn't even have to clean out a desk. With hoteling, every employee has "one foot out the door" at all times. Hoteling sends an important message to the employee: "Your employment is temporary. Keep your photos of your ugly family in the trunk of your car so we don't have to look at them." Source: The Dilbert Principle, by Scott Adams ************************************************************************** * Well, the pigeons have done it and New Yorkers are still trying * ************************************************************************** A full page of letters from readers in a September issue of New Scientist magazine reported sightings by London, England, tube [that's subway for Americans] riders who say they saw pigeons board, and disembark from, subway cars in "purposeful" way that suggest they have figured out where they are going. Source: News of the Weird ************************************************************************** * The following are taken from actual letters received by the Welfare * * Department in applications for support (in other words, true) * ************************************************************************** 1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I had seven but one died which was baptised on a half sheet of paper. 2. I am writing the welfare department to say that my baby was born two years old. When do I get my money? 3. Mrs. Jones has not had any clothes for two years and has been visited regularly by the clergy. 4. I cannot get sick pay. I have six children can you tell me why? 5. This is my eighth child. What are you going to do about it. 6. I am very much annoyed to find out that you have branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married a week before he was born. 7. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my 3 children one of which is a mistake as you can see. 8. Unless I get my husband's money pretty soon, I will be forced to lead an immortal life. 9. I want money as quick as I can get it. I have been in bed with the doctor for two weeks and he doesn't do me any good. If things don't improve, I will have to send for another doctor. Source: Ginny ************************************************************************** * THOSE WHO MAY CARE |\__ --- ___/| MOO THINKS: * * \-- 0 0\--/ * * ____ =====================/ \ "What's the sense in * * // --//'''''''''''''''''''' _ oo | ever thinking about * * __// // / \_/\_/ the tomb. When * * //~~~ | | '' you're much too * * {} | _ _ __________ / busy returning to * * || || \ / || || the womb." * * || || ||| || || -TMBG * * || || ''' || || * * [] [] [] [] - Alex P * **************************************************************************